New Excerpt from “A Most Handsome Gentleman” #HOTCollins

I promised three items from my Meryton Press published mini-novel A Most Handsome Gentleman some weeks ago. Here’s the second of the three: an excerpt from the Netherfield ball. Prior to the excerpt, Charlotte has been introduced to Mr. Collins, who likes both her and Jane, and Elizabeth has agreed to dance with Mr. Darcy. The narrator is Elizabeth Bennet.

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Charlotte stretched her neck to see something beyond our nearest neighbours. “I wonder what he said to Mr. Bingley to get his colour up. Mr. Bingley’s easy-going nature does not usually allow him to become so inflamed.”

I rose on tiptoe to see for myself. “Oh, no! He is attempting to lure Jane to the supper dance, yet she has promised that set to Mr. Bingley. They are fighting over her again. Pardon me.”

Chayseland Taylor as Mr. Darcy.

As I made my way to the argument, I was thwarted by Mr. Darcy collecting me for his dance. He appeared seemingly out of nowhere and made a formal bow before me. I craned my neck around him to catch a glimpse of the commotion. With a drawn brow of confusion, he followed my gaze. His lips were a thin line of disapproval when his attention was once again fixed upon me.

“What are we to do?” I asked. “I do not want to draw attention to them, yet I hope to stop this foolishness at once.”

“What do you think they argue over?”

I gaped at him. “My sister! Jane! They both wish to court her. Mr. Bingley is clearly her preference, yet my cousin stubbornly refuses to give way.”

Robert Waller esq. as Mr. Bingley.

“She prefers Bingley?”

“Anyone with eyes can see that she does.”

Mr. Darcy looked intently at them. “I can see no greater admiration towards any person. She smiles no matter with whom she converses.”

“She is shy and does not want to expose her feelings for fear of being hurt. But observe her eyes—how they shine when she looks at Mr. Bingley. That tells the tale.”

It was not the best time to say such a thing. Jane’s eyes were not shining at the moment. Instead, she was glaring at my cousin as if she wished him to burn up and disappear like a guttering candle.

“Please excuse me.” I did not look at Mr. Darcy while I quickly curtseyed and dashed off in the direction of the altercation. I was not certain how he would take my abandonment of him for the promised dance. Goodness knows, I had seen the expression of disapproval on his face often enough, and to make matters worse, I could not expect to dance with him later in lieu of the delay. Mr. Darcy had indicated a propensity for implacable resentment, and this was one of the times I deserved it.

My goal when I reached the disagreement was clear: find a way to separate my cousin from Jane and Mr. Bingley. Was this going to be an easy task? His handsome face was twisted into something unpleasant, and even so, he was still the most comely man in the room. Who could chastise a fellow so fine looking as to be admired by every lady present?

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Do you not just love the handsome gentlemen in this blog post? But what about Mr. Collins vying for Jane, and Mr. Darcy’s knowledge that Jane prefers Mr. Bingley?

Remember, I have a prize package to be drawn in April and you must comment or follow my blog to enter. It consists of a signed copy of A Most Handsome Gentleman, a choice of a Suzan Lauder TSRCE hand made pineapple reticule or grown-up lady’s lace cap, and some other trinkets.

You can look forward to another A Most Handsome Gentleman post in the next weeks, but this time, it’s not only related to my book, but also to my blog series on writing tips, Learning from my Mistakes.

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Happy Birthday to Meryton Press author Amy George, who is celebrating by continuing her blog tour for The Sweetest Ruin.

New Year’s Day Bonus: Book Sale and Excerpt from #HOTCollins

On New Year’s Day 2018, the price of A Most Handsome Gentleman will be reduced for 24 hours to $2.99, an excellent price for a Meryton Press book. To help celebrate my book’s sale, I’m sharing an excerpt that was planned for the blog tour, but fewer excerpts were requested by bloggers than I had prepared. Of course, the number of excerpts was balanced by more of the other kinds of guest spots as detailed (with links) in my last blog post.

(Aside—the 24 hour sale is available only in the US and UK because this option is not offered to publishers by Amazon in other countries. Sale hours are PST in the US, GMT in the UK).

Today’s excerpt is a behind-the-scenes moment from Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, and details the excitement when the Bingleys have dropped by to invite the Bennets to the Netherfield Ball—and handsome Mr. Collins is invited as well. It’s from the point of view of Miss Elizabeth Bennet.

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Mr. Bingley and Elizabeth Bennet by Charles Brock courtesy Wikimedia

“A ball!” was repeated over and over as if my sisters required assurance that it actually had been said, and Lydia and Kitty first clasped each other’s hands and bobbed up and down, then continued the same activity with everyone else in the room. Mr. Bingley chuckled, not at all displeased with my sisters’ enthusiasm. Even Miss Bingley, elegantly attired in the most fashionable gown with an elaborate chemisette, found their raptures amusing as her mouth tilted sideways in a half smirk, though whether in disdain, self-importance that her invitation was the cause of this delight, or pure enjoyment of the scene was not clear to me.

Mr. Collins slid into the room, no doubt curious regarding all the noise, and my two youngest sisters rushed to greet him and share the good news. He held his hands in the air, palms forward, and tried to frighten them with his glare, but they both just giggled before resuming their seats and chattering, heads close together, peeping at Mr. Collins with alarmingly lascivious expressions.

Dear Jane spoke for us all and graciously accepted on behalf of our family. My cousin spun to face her with a queer expression. One brow was tucked down in the middle of his face, and his lip and nostril on the same side were raised, as if he were questioning something unpleasant—or possibly even unseemly—at least, to him it was.

Rather than continue my attempt to decipher his strange expression, my recent discussions with Mr. Collins made me bold enough to question him. “Sir, do you not intend to accept the invitation? Perhaps you do not believe it a proper amusement for young people, yet I am certain Mr. Bingley hopes you will join us, even if you may object to dancing yourself.”

“On the contrary, Cousin Elizabeth. Both the Archbishop and Lady Catherine admire my ability to discern the difference between wholesome entertainment and activities unbecoming to a cleric. A private ball given by a sensible gentleman and attended by respectable gentlemen such as myself has no tendency for evil. You know my generous disposition well enough by now—I could not deprive the neighbourhood ladies my hand in the dance. I also must take this opportunity to assure my three fair cousins that they will be among the first to stand up with me.” Lydia and Kitty faced each other with smirks and burst into giggles before they resumed their admiration of Mr. Collins. They must have become accustomed to him ignoring their existence.

Mr. Bingley took his point. “Indeed, Mr. Collins! We will be delighted to see you take your position in the line.” He addressed Jane. “Following your cousin’s good example, I request the first two dances of you, Miss Bennet.”

Jane’s cheeks are always a little pink, but at that moment, the colour flowed beyond its borders and across her entire face and onto her neck and upper chest left uncovered by her fichu. “I thank you, sir, I accept.”

Mr. Bingley’s face lit up. “Capital!” He glanced towards his sister. Miss Bingley tilted her head and offered a forced and weary smile. Her brother returned his beaming face to Jane, who could have been fevered again, she was so flushed. My poor shy older sister could not reflect his grand grin to share his elation, though she kept trying, peeking up through her lashes while her lips were curved up in the sweetest fashion imaginable, even for Jane. This was obviously encouragement, as he added, “And the supper dance?”

Everyone was diverted when Mr. Collins cleared his throat loudly. When he spoke, his voice was firm and chastising. “Mr. Bingley! Your assumption is not at all gentleman-like.” His tone was that of a parent scolding a child.

Mr. Bingley’s eyes went wide. “Excuse me, sir? I do not comprehend your meaning.”

“I am quite sure you do, sir. You are well aware that Miss Bennet is my cousin.”

Mr. Bingley hesitated, his expression further confused, if possible. “Y-yes?”

“I have priority.”

“Priority?”

I had to agree with the incredulity in Mr. Bingley’s voice. What sort of priority? What could Mr. Collins mean? I searched my cousin’s face, and his lips were pursed and his brow folded, yet he was still terrifically good looking. How could he manage such a feat?

~~~

Of course, it’s because he’s the hottest man to ever enter Hertfordshire! Or so it seems…

You’ll love the campy humour of this Pride and Prejudice variation. It’s not too long (I jokingly call it my mini-novel) therefore providing a quick and fun read.

I meant to post this excerpt early last month, but I didn’t want to draw attention away from the blog tour for Audrey Ryan’s debut novel All the Things I Know (the book is reduced to $2.99 tomorrow Jan. 2 only!). Then Christmas came, followed by a week-long bout of extreme vertigo, which is being minimized by exercises and should be over soon. The sale day for A Most Handsome Gentleman aka #HOTCollins seemed to be the best time to share a new excerpt, so here we are today. I’ll have the promised second excerpt and the article for Learning from My Mistakes in the next weeks.